Fatherly Advice

So there I was once again. Trying to explain to my father some bullshit version of post modernism that made the not-having-a-plan the plan of the 21st century. I enjoy talking in literary terms with my father. It's the only way I can at least pretend to know something he doesn't. It didn't work.

The previous night my father had proudly declared that there was no generation gap between him and his children while my brother and I attempted to conceal our laughter. He's convinced that he knows exactly how 'youngsters' think, not realizing that using the term 'youngsters' already disqualifies him from the claim. I sat there wide eyed, almost in disbelief as to how deluded people could be. 'No generation gap between me and him,' I thought, 'that's like saying men have vaginas or something.'

My father keeps pushing on the what-will-you-do-with-your-life discussion and is unwilling to accept my I-don't-know-will-you-please-pass-the-chicken. He says that his job is to advise people on what careers they should choose and that qualifies him to be some sort of a career advisor to me not realizing that I'm his son and I know he's a banker.

I have no idea how to be honest with the man. I've always tactically chosen what to say in front of him but this was one of those moments where I was completely lost for words. I started thinking of occupations in my head: 'um, economic forecaster... no, he'll tell you to read the newspaper, umm, Engineer... no, it's too late for that, ummm, pornstar... what's wrong with you?' I eventually tell him that I want to go into academia (I really don't think I do) and that's enough to conclude tonight's discussion but I have no idea what I'll say tomorrow. Actually, I'll probably just tell him that I love writing papers (I hate writing papers).

I keep telling myself: 'Two more months till you're back in college, lets not say anything we'll regret.'